just in case we get into the whole deep hole of mulling over THAT something, i have this for you from Elizabethtown:

Drew Baylor: [voiceover]

There's a diffrence between a failure and a fiasco. A failure is merely the absence of success. Any fool can achieve failure. But a fiasco, a fiasco is a disaster of epic propotions. A fiasco is a folk tale told to other's to make other people feel more alive because it didn't happen to them.


STILL mulling over the loss nor lack of direction?

Hollie Baylor: I was still waiting for everything to start, and now it's over.

even if i stood you up, there's no need to ring me up and in fact , me offering to get dinner for you was a plus, im not your servant, and u needn't use that f--king tone on me

i'm just so glad im leaving.

like how mags always say!

TOTAL YAYNESS!

liberation is just well on its way

i saw a friend having a nintendo ds lite, and i think its fun

nice

i'm totally exhausted but i still feel that my work is not up to standard.

sigh

u know how some people pry into your privacy and then think its ok but when u just ask them alittle bit on their private lives, they get all worked up and secretive?

I DETEST THOSE PEOPLE

if you want respect, u hav to give people the respect first

and you obviously didn't , as a person, i think you're utterly disgusting, selfish and quite a liar as well

dinner and drinks at the uni bar , the food was actually good and it was much cheaper than wordies ! definitely one more hangout place to go

andd then again i cut the back of my hair! loving it now YAYs

soya sauce chicken
bacon cheese omelette
vegatables
watercrest soup!

YUMMY!

i must say im quite a chef =)

just 10 more days!

i think im getting alittle cranky now since the thesis submission's 12 days away

not pmsing , just cranky

we wanted to destress!

the asian party last night was one of the best i had! haha the company i had rocked! simon's friends from singapore came and jiaxuan and i brought them to REJI NIGHT!

had alot of drinks, got high, had fun, danced the night away

HAKIM u shud have been there!!

pictures up as soon as i get them

some things, it's true, last forever. some things though, i've learnt to be afraid to promise. it's okay to not be able to give forever, just don't pretend you can. maybe, though, fear is the most affirming emotion in the human condition, because fear means you have something to lose.

about old friends

the thing about old friends is that they know you. they know what you are trying to express even as you try to find the words to do so. they elicit the response that you what, and they feel the same way as you do. like how we crave the same food, or how we all itched to go somewhere else while watching a movie.

even more than that, they know your family. they know the situation, they know the difficulties. the was, the had been. and more important than that, they take time and find chance to know about the now. they tell you that they are desperate to meet you and that this 1 to 1 conversation is good. they spend time to take long meals together, because we get to talk to one another.

they discuss with you about your future and the reminisce the past with you. they tell you how much they appreciate the fact that you know what they are talking about. and how you are different. and they look back at all that happened and tell you that they felt touched about this friendship the same way as you do. and yes, they feel that our friendship is really "damn solid" too. we come together to laugh, we see the tears that arent cried. we can bitch with just eye communication too.

and the lesson to learnt from this is that, all these above doesnt come by chance or effortlessly. for every friendship kept, there is that someone holding on to that string of yours, tugging it every once in a while to make sure you arent lost in sight.

so here's to you, who has kept me for all these years.

loves.

you know even if people stand you up for occasion, life goes on ?

so even if people start saying that they cannot make it, u dun just cancel it because there are still others, FYI.

i have thesis to write also, why do i still even bother?

Sam! says:
if no one does anything means they are not interested in meeting up
so u want to meet up for what

i think sam just enlightened me

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PI!

yes zef, here is your post

i must first clarify by saying that it is not because i dislike you zef! haha

okays the story goes like this

i was busy doing my work in the library at 4ish when it started raining and pretty sweet zef offered to bring an umbrella to me even though he just got home not too long ago but of cos i kindly rejected

and then i was telling mark abt it and he then promptly offered to bring me one too but of cos i rejected as well . He tried to tempt me with all sorts of things like my comfy bed , lying in his arms ( WHICH WAS UTTER CRAP) but i had a good laugh over it and then yes , the ultimatum was when he said it had been awhile since he walked in the rain so yes,fine bring me an umbrella

BUT when he reached it stopped raining and i felt utterly mean and bad but yes i thank you both for being such wonderful friends =) i really did appreciate YOU zef haha dont' be mistaken!

thank you both so very much for making my day =)

i write here, like a mail to myself. A point where I have so much words bottled up, but no where to say to. And thoughts in bottles are dangerous things. They take on a life of their own.

Little things make me sad. While little things make me hopeful. And with hope comes disappointment. And more sadness. The middle way suggests a life with no desires. Unfortunately I do not and can not buy this. If life has no desires. Then what exactly does life encompass? It would be like a chocolate coronet without the cream. In other words, an empty shell. But desires are like the thorny crown. The tighter you wear it, the deeper it bites. But alas. Egad!

I desire so much. Such a long road. Such a long road. Then I realize. While I'm looking at the faraway, I have lost my way in the myriad of present. But go on. There is no try. There is no turning back. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

woah i've been doing everyting except work

woke up , watched 90210 which my frend passed to me

then watch america's nxt top model

then watched american idol!

then i baked butter cake, made corn carrot soup! boiled it for hours

now , im watching one tree hill!!!

oh my gosh, when will i ever start writing the discussion!!!

i know things are tough now, i know it's overwhelming and discouraging and sometimes just painful. and i could think of a million things to say or do, but they wouldn't be enough. so i'm here if you need me, but more to the point, i pray you find your greatest comfort in Him. He loves you, He hasn't brought you to this place to let you drown, but so you learn what it is to hold onto a Lifeline that will not let you slip, much less sink.

you don't have to have it all together, part of the point of not being alone is that we discover how we need one another precisely because sometimes we find we can't make it on our own. so there is room for dependence on one another, there is space to discover we need others. God programmed us to rely on one another, that's the way it is. it's a beautiful (even if terrifying) thing.

i just sold my car for almost the same price i bought it and i must say i really have to thank God for bringing this buyer! he really was smooth and easy to deal =)

parting with little nicky ( a name given by zef ) was definitely not easy , from now on , i cannot just go to whichever place i want to because im sick of doing work / am bored at home. With the car, i definitely enjoyed life here in brisbane more because i get to go wherever i want without people's approval because ITS MY CAR =) my dad was really nice in getting me one just for my convenience to travel to the lab even though bus rides were pretty much accessible! but of cos for his daughter, he would give everything and im thankful for my father



ah, im glad i managed to sell it at such a price =) and now its back to walking, busrides and ferry rides which i still enjoy! of cos it takes time getting used to it but i believe im pretty much very adaptable to this

YAYNESS