no job ?

i've sent out more than 10 emails for some job ads but of cos , none of them got back to me who wants someone who can only work for 1 month ? most of you would say confirm can find la, just keep looking! by the time i eventually get one , i think i would be on the plane flying towards brisbane

everyday i dread waking up, cos i know there wouldn't be anything i can do that is productive in my life at all

having just 2 slices of bread with peanut butter for breakfast and lunch sure doesnt help in keeping me happy, why does losing weight always have to be so tedious and painful, why cant it just be kaboom, and u lose like 10kg i wished the world has this machine where i step in and determine how much i wanna become, fat or thin , just based on my mood that day

sigh.

on another note , my mum asked me what i want for my birthday since its approaching, and yes there's alot of things i want but i dun actually need them

i guess i only need a digicam so that i can bring it to aussie and my parents can take the exsisting one to china in september when they go on holiday!

and besides im already getting a new laptop for school , what else can i ask for when they are paying tens of thousands for me to get a decent education i dun wanna be thinking " mummy i want this i want that " all the time

i do not need clothes,shoes or accessories i think i have more than enough to survive for the next decade . OK that is so not true, 10 years later, if i wear wad im wearing now , i think i'll become the retro woman of the year =) ok my clothes now definitely cannot suffice me for 10 years.

honestly , i wanna receive presents.. i have already forgotten that kinda surprise or happiness one gets when u actually receive a present, i have no idea why im feeling that way, but i just want presents! but i dun exactly want any, ok i bet u guys dunno what im talking abt or just maybe strike me of as being fickle minded but yes i do want to receive presents yet i don't exactly wish for them. ok weird me

i want that huge sunflower "softtoy" thats always in the take departmental store but yesterday it was gone , and now i cant buy it to bring over and put it in australia =(

doing nothing makes my mind wander off to a whole different world and i wish i need not step outta it